Marching to the beat of our own Drum

Goodbye y'all

2010-08-13T20:52:00.001-06:00

This is the last post for houseofrappleye.blogspot.com

All I have to say is "It's been fun. But a new dawn has come"

Hope for the hopeless

2010-08-13T20:48:00.000-06:00

Stitch in your knitted brow
And you don't know how
You're gonna get it out
Crushed under heavy chest
Trying to catch your breath
But it always beats you by a step, all right now

Making the best of it
Playing the hand you get
You're not alone in this

There's hope for the hopeless

Cold in a summer breeze
Yeah, you're shivering
On your bended knee
Still, when you're heart is sore
And the heavens pour
Like a willow bending with the storm, you'll make it

Running against the wind
Playing the cards you get
Something is bound to give

There's hope for the hopeless

Sesame Street Grief

2010-07-26T13:52:00.004-06:00

Grab your Dictionary.... its time for word of the day!!!!

Monday:
douche bag
a wretched and disgusting person. (Rude and derogatory.) : Don't be a douche bag. Pick up your things and go home, Chuck.

Tuesday:
Abandonment
The act of surrendering a claim to, or interest in, a particular asset.

Wednesday:
Coward
a person who lacks courage in facing danger, difficulty, opposition, pain, etc.; a timid or easily intimidated person.

Thursday:
Empty
destitute of some quality or qualities; devoid (usually fol. by of ): Theirs is a life now empty of happiness.

Friday:
Rebound
to bound or spring back from force of impact.

Join us next time for more word fun!!!

Portrait of an ESTP - Extraverted Sensing Thinking Perceiving

2010-07-19T10:39:00.002-06:00

The Doer

As an ESTP, your primary mode of living is focused externally, where you take things in via your five senses in a literal, concrete fashion. Your secondary mode is internal, where you deal with things rationally and logically.
ESTPs are outgoing, straight-shooting types. Enthusiastic and excitable, ESTPs are "doers" who live in the world of action. Blunt, straight-forward risk-takers, they are willing to plunge right into things and get their hands dirty. They live in the here-and-now, and place little importance on introspection or theory. The look at the facts of a situation, quickly decide what should be done, execute the action, and move on to the next thing.
ESTPs have an uncanny ability to perceive people's attitudes and motivations. They pick up on little cues which go completely unnoticed by most other types, such as facial expressions and stance. They're typically a couple of steps ahead of the person they're interacting with. ESTPs use this ability to get what they want out of a situation. Rules and laws are seen as guidelines for behavior, rather than mandates. If the ESTP has decided that something needs to be done, then their "do it and get on with it" attitude takes precendence over the rules. However, the ESTP tends to have their own strong belief in what's right and what's wrong, and will doggedly stick to their principles. The Rules of the Establishment may hold little value to the ESTP, but their own integrity mandates that they will not under any circumstances do something which they feel to be wrong.
ESTPs have a strong flair for drama and style. They're fast-moving, fast-talking people who have an appreciation for the finer things in life. They may be gamblers or spendthrifts. They're usually very good at story telling and improvising. They typically makes things up as they go along, rather than following a plan. They love to have fun, and are fun people to be around. They can sometimes be hurtful to others without being aware of it, as they generally do not know and may not care about the effect their words have on others. It's not that they don't care about people, it's that their decision-making process does not involve taking people's feelings into account. They make decisions based on facts and logic.
ESTP's least developed area is their intuitive side. They are impatient with theory, and see little use for it in their quest to "get things done". An ESTP will occasionally have strong intuitions which are often way off-base, but sometimes very lucid and positive. The ESTP does not trust their instincts, and is suspicious of other people's intuition as well.
The ESTP often has trouble in school, especially higher education which moves into realms where theory is more important. The ESTP gets bored with classes in which they feel they gain no useful material which can be used to get things done. The ESTP may be brilliantly intelligent, but school will be a difficult chore for them.
The ESTP needs to keep moving, and so does well in careers where he or she is not restricted or confined. ESTPs make extremely good salespersons. They will become stifled and unhappy dealing with routine chores. ESTPs have a natural abundance of energy and enthusiasm, which makes them natural entrepreneurs. They get very excited about things, and have the ability to motivate others to excitement and action. The can sell anyone on any idea. They are action-oriented, and make decisions quickly. All-in-all, they have extraordinary talents for getting things started. They are not usually so good at following through, and might leave those tasks to others. Mastering the art of following through is something which ESTPs should pay special attention to.
ESTPs are practical, observant, fun-loving, spontaneous risk-takers with an excellent ability to quickly improvise an innovative solution to a problem. They're enthusiastic and fun to be with, and are great motivators. If an ESTP recognizes their real talents and operates within those realms, they can accomplish truly exciting things.
Jungian functional preference ordering:
Dominant: Extraverted Sensing
Auxiliary: Introverted Thinking
Tertiary: Extraverted Feeling
Inferior: Introverted Intuition

FIND OUT WHO YOU ARE...

http://www.personalitytype.com/career_quiz

I walked a mile in their moccasins and would like to apologize.

2010-07-16T09:57:00.004-06:00

Although I spent the last 5 days in New Mexico, the land of Native American and Mexican history, this blog is not about them.
What I really did is look back and reflect on myself. NM is such a spiritual place, with all the sacred land, holy cathedrals, and sanctuaries. I feel disappointed in myself. I am so used to my world being so small. Just me. Rarely family and friends come and go so quickly I forgot how to be there for people. And now, after living in Salt Lake for over 3 years, I am afraid of losing people I care about, however I realize, I never did anything to keep them around. I am talking about my new family. Made up of in-laws, friends, and co-workers. I am so used to being alone that I don't know how to treat the people that have my back. WWSFAD. What would saint Francis of Assisi do? He would get excited for BBQ's, Birthdays, Reunions, any gathering of friends and family. So I need to put my ADHD aside for a moment.... stop being so anxious.... listen more.... I need to be ok with silence.
The funny thing I always do that I did not notice was hurting me was saying "If they want to tell me something, then they will bring it up in conversation." With all the books I have been reading the week I know how wrong that is. I need to ask more questions.... people don't open themselves up that easy (well I do). I do want to hear about peoples experiences. I love fun interesting stories about childhood. But I NEED to ask more questions. How come they dont teach this stuff in school?
I know I am opinionated and have a strong personality.... instead of calming down to the point where I am a different person.... I need to reserve that energy for the fun party loud nights with friends. The truth is I love everyone.... and I will miss EVERYONE if they leave my life. I guess I need to work on showing it.
I will start my saying thank you..... Thank you for putting up with me and still inviting me to come around. I love my In-laws.... really.... all of them.... they are so different from my family.. sometimes it makes me feel inadequate.... I wish them all the success int he world. And Thank You to a group of friends who took me in although I was the outsider/newbie. Its been years since I had a group of friends that I got so excited to see each weekend. I love their kids and they are amazing examples on parenthood. Thanks for making me break down my wall and camp.

I will leave you with one more thing:
The sense of belonging is a basic need and at the same time the answer to a question. We ask ourselves: What am I part of? And this question resembles- perhaps coincides with- another equally crucial question: Who am I? We belong to a family, a group, a society, a professional category; and the affiliation define us and give us reasons fro existing. Without this belonging, we would feel like nothing.
"The power of forgiveness" Piero Ferrucci

They call me mellow yellow

2010-07-11T12:43:00.005-06:00

I could get really personal in this blog and say all that really happened this past week. The worst week of my life thus far. But instead I choose to share what I have learned about myself, life, and people. Which in turn is completely related to this past weeks events.
Yesterday I read for 6 1/2 hours. I completed from beginning to end a book called "The Color Code" first. In this book it has you complete a 50 question survey, then classifies you into a personality color group. I am Yellow. Anyone who has read this book knows what that means and is probably saying to yourselves "yes, Rena, you are yellow". No personality color is BETTER than the other. That is the important thing to remember. This book teaches you how to identify others peoples color groups so you know how to act and react towards them.. It helps explain why people do what they do. Their flaws and their strengths. Spencer is a White, the Peacekeeper. An introvert. A lone wolf. The one who prefers to watch the big crown rather than to join in. Audrey (Spencer’s mom) told me a storey on Wednesday about Spencer. When he was about 10 years old he came home from school and was greeted by his mother. She asked "What did you do today at recess?" His reply "Nothing. I just sit on the wall and watch the other kids play."
Now keep in mind.... we NEED all the color personalities to make this world work. For every White we need a Red. Red are the money driven, CEO wannabe, power hungry folk that start the large multi-million companies. White does not need all that, they just want to have peace and gain knowledge. Yellows don’t desire power or wealth either. Yellows want excitement, fun, bright lights and lots of color. They are the loud mouth chatterboxes who hate being too serious and often are perceived as vain. If fact they love people, all kinds of people, of all ages. Yellows don’t talk because they like to hear themselves talk, they talk because 'like a child' everything is interesting in them. Yellows can live almost anywhere, and they usually try. Its true, yellows talk too much and they cant sit still, but they are the motivators. They provide much needed humor and encouragement in the world.

Now that I know I am a yellow. How can I change my abrasive, loud mouth, talkative ways? One word… Kindness.
Here are some quotes that might be useful to all the other yellows out there:

“You can make more friends in two months by becoming genuinely interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.” How to win friends and influence people

“When I first decided to serve others, I didn’t realize it meant forgiving them.” The Code

“We are most effective in understanding other people when we see them whole - treating them as complete personalities rather than focusing on either their strengths or limitations.” The Color Code

Why does 26 feel so old?

2010-06-10T11:12:00.004-06:00

2002

I was tagged in a photo on facebook the other day. I photo during my first year of College at the ripe age of 18. I remember that girl; so full of life and filled with hope. The life of the party and the shoulder to cry on. She loved fashion and spent most afternoons in LA's fashion district. She could party all night and be on the dance floor until 5am. Her friends were from around the world and had culture and traditions to teach her. Everyday was an adventure. Everyday was a party. She was invincible.... or so she thought.... she is dead now... ina sense. What happened to me? Well I grew up. They say you gain 1 pound of fat each year after the age of 20. Well I thought I was special, because me weight was not increasing.... then I turned age 23.... 3 pounds..... age 24....... 9 pounds..... age 25...... 3 more pounds..... WTF. And now as I try to deny my rapidly arriving birthday I will not step on a scale. Its not that my weight gain scares me.... who cares.... I still think I look good.... I am just fed up with buying new jeans. My sizes keep changing and its pissing me off. And for all the people rolling their eyes saying "that's not allot of weight, stop complaining." I would like to show you the long trail of stretch marks down the side of my thighs and bum, then hear you say "its no big deal", ya that's right... stretch marks! They must have been created by the devil, cause no God of mine would mark my body with humiliating lines as a reminder of my increasing age and size.
On the other hand.... I have also gained a husband.... a bigger family.... a new appreciation for the outdoors.... a love of my curly hair.... and much more. And with all that... I except my new body, I except my gray hairs and striped legs. Now if I could only find some stretch jeans.

2010

Life or something like it

2010-06-08T13:05:00.004-06:00

Project SLUG was moving along faster than expected.... until I hit road block called the IRS that works ar a slug pace (ironicaly). What I have noticed is people dont take you seriously when you say you want to start a non-profit. Everyone (family & friends) think you will either give up or fail. Guess what..... I am not BullShiting you! I wan to do this. I want to make the community better. I want to get out of the corporate world. And I AM really doing it. We do need vomlunteers. If you would like to help let me know. We will be having our first meeting to include volunteers in a few weeks. This summer is all about fundraising.... we need to get prepared... get that bank account up. Let me know if you want to help.

The Summer of 2009 was full of adventure and exploration. 2010 will be even better. More camping, More hiking, More fishing, plus added Mountain Biking! We bought a new tent, large enough to house our queen size air bed and 2 bikes... with room to spare. I have already been looking at our Utah map and finding lakes and rivers I want to discover. I am excited

This last picture serves no purpose and has no relation to my life. However it makes me laugh.

WTF US Gov - What decade are we in?

2010-05-07T10:01:00.003-06:00

So what is a negro exactly? According to the dictionary....

Ne·gro
1. Anthropology . a member of the peoples traditionally classified as the Negro race, esp. those who originate in sub-Saharan Africa: no longer in technical use.
–adjective
2. of, pertaining to, or characteristic of one of the traditional racial divisions of humankind, generally marked by brown to black skin pigmentation, dark eyes, and woolly or crisp hair and including esp. the indigenous peoples of Africa south of the Sahara.
3. being a member of the black peoples of humankind, esp. those who originate in sub-Saharan Africa.

So why are people (like myself) upset by this absurd question on the 2010 Census.... because it is bullshit. Tell me right now... what is the difference between Black, African American and Negro? What would a Dominican Republican choose? Or a Brazilian?
Oh and I like how they give 'Asian Indian' as an option and then say 'Asian Other'.... I like that other can be everything else in that huge continent. When I received my census form I refused to check a box, and instead wrote a friendly note stating "I am not a box, I am not one race. I am multiracial and wont to be recognized as so. I am Jamaican and I am Italian. I am Both equally". One week later I received another Census form, apparently the didn't like my answer. I wrote "F this" on it and mailed it back blank.

Its not that I am against the idea of the census... I support the cause. I just don't agree with the wording of the question. If I was in charge of the Census I would ask 3 questions:
1. How many people in your household?
2. Annual household income.
3. Are you a natural born citizen or did you immigrate here? If a immigrant, what country did you immigrate from _______?

I think where you were born is more important than what the color of your skin is. After all...

When I born, I Black...
When I grow up, I Black...
When I go in Sun, I Black...
When I scared, I Black..
When I sick, I Black..
And when I die,I still black...

And you White fellow..
When you born, you pink..
When you grow up, you White...
When you go in Sun, you Red..
When you cold, you blue...
When you scared, you yellow..
When you sick, you Green...
And when you die, you Gray...
And you call me colored??

Summer Here I Come!

2010-03-19T13:10:00.003-06:00

I got my Mountain Bike yesterday!

I cant wait to take it out on the trails.

Its a Diamondback Lustre 1 ( I dunno if that means anything, but I like it).

Isn't she beautiful.

New Blog

2010-03-18T17:41:00.003-06:00

slcfashion.blogspot.com

Please follow my new blog.

I feel like I need to get back to what I know. Its relaxing and fun for me.
So I created a new blog about the fashion industry in Utah (or lack there of).

I promise not to over-post.

Thanks Rena

I can see clearly now the rain is gone...

2010-03-17T14:23:00.003-06:00

Life Update:

Work has been going great. Very busy. The weather has been beautiful. I am ready for an action packed summer. I even came up with a fun summer goal. Maybe I have been watching too much Lost, but I really want to be able to track people/animals in the wild. Doesnt that sound like a great skill to have. I can help find lost children or finally see a moose. Maybe I will be the one who finds Susan Powells body and help solve the case. I wish my life were a blend of CSI vegas and Lost.

We leave in a couple of weeks for Austin Texas. 4 days of music, drinks, dancing, and sunny weather. Oh and Texas BBQ of course! I am so excited. I have no desire to see anywhere else in Texas. Spencer is all the cowboy and country music I need, but I do want to see Austin. Who knows I might come back with a new Tattoo.

When we get back from Texas I have one thing on my Agenda... "Get A Mountain Bike"!!!!!

Nothing too Fancy. But something to get me outside in the sun and keep me in shape.

Lets go ride!

Today is St. Patricks Day. I wore a Ireland flag pin that Rachel got me when she went to Dublin. And I plan on celebrating with a beer cocktail I saw on TV this morning. Presenting the Guiness Float

Wanna Try?

"Fuck Lent" he said

2010-03-02T09:21:00.003-07:00

I was raised by an amazing women. She was a devote Catholic throughout adolescence and attended mass regularly. As she matured and went to college she stopped going to mass to explore other religious ventures. Christian revivals in people backyards with lots of song and dance. Or even other ways to become more spiritual: Thai Chi in the park, Drum circles, art classes, yoga, etc. In her 30's she found herself becoming a mother and wanted something to pass on to her children. So the taught them respect and reverence by taking them to Catholic mass. They learned at a early age about sacrifice, chastity, and confessing your sins.
Being one of her children raised with the privilege to see many different forms of spirituality I am comfortable to create my own level of religion and peace. I do not go to mass, but I still remember kneeling in prayer beside my mother and brother. I do not go to confession, but I do feel the need to speak my sins aloud to cleanse my guilty heart. One thing I do, every year, since I was just a child, is celebrate Lent. I like knowing I can still sacrifice something I put value on but maybe don't appreciate for 40 days and 40 nights. Its the least I can do. Really giving up coffee for Lent is the least I could do. But I enjoy Lent. It reminds me to be grateful of all the little things. So when I say "No I cant drink that, I gave coffee up for Lent." and you reply "Fuck Lent." you might as well be saying " Fuck you, fuck everything you hold dear, fuck tradition, fuck your family, and fuck anything I don't understand."
In conclusion: I am happy with who I am and what I believe. I am at peace with my religious stance and am not worried where my soul will end up. Are you? Or do you claim a religion to your family and not to your friends? Fuck that. Fuck being fake to please others. I am who I am and dammit I am stubborn.

Tempted by the fruit of another

2010-01-13T09:44:00.002-07:00

Dear food,

I thought we were doing so great.

We didn't have to sneak around anymore.

But every time life is good you turn on me.

Its like I don't know you anymore.

You don't comfort me anymore.

You push me away.

You cause me pain.

STOP!

Stop tempting me with your mouth watering aromas.

Stop being so interesting and foreign.

You are not good for me.

I need to reevaluate our relationship.

I may not be able to rid you from my life for good,

But things will never be the same between us.

GOODBYE!

Take your spices, fried food, and tomatoes.

I will replace you.

You have burned me for the last time.

Goodbye my tempter.

Goodbye my secret lover.

Today I choose love and turn from pain.

From,

Rena's Stomach

"You are just like your mother"

2010-01-04T10:54:00.005-07:00

"You are just like your mother" Spencer said after a day with my folks.

"Thanks" I repied.

This goofey fun loving liberal woman who gave me life (and a fun one too) never looses her humor and heart. Forget 'Mothers day', there should me 'Rhonda Rupe Day'.

When I grow up I want to be just like her. Except taller and black lol.

I feel like I should write more. But the truth is nothing iis really going on. Christmas came and went (yay). Spencer and I were both spoiled. Spencer got a Mountain Bike, Fly Rod, Ipod, etc. I got a Jewelry Box, Tickets to see Avenue Q, Snow Gloves, 4 Computer Games, etc. Christmas Eve we played Beatles RockBand and stayed over at Paul and Audrey's House.

New Years Eve was the worst day at work I have ever experienced. People were so rude. I got cursed at by 3 complete strangers, You might be wondering what I did to deserve it, well one guy was angry he could not be upgraded to a suite for free, one guy thought he booked a ski package and deserved free passes when he was paying $56 (the ski passes are $58 each and the package is about $203 a night. So for those of you who dont travel often and search online for the cheapest rate and expect to be rewarded for it..... I have a message to you:

To those who book on Priceline, Hotwire, or Expedia and are paying $40 for a room.

No you can not have a free breakfast.

No you can not have free parking.

You will get the room you are assigned, go ahead and complain.

We dont face the Temple, so if you want a view go stand outside.

Guess what! If we sell out I will kick you out first!

New Years Eve is a busy day for hotels, if you stay here dont complain about noise, its f*@#ing New Years Eve... it will be loud EVERYWHERE.

Happy Traveling you cheap scum.

Thanks for bearing with me while I rant. Its been a hard week. I am so excited for all of the adventures this Spring/Summer I cant wait until the snow melts.

Ok I have to get back to work.

The Mountain Bike

2009-12-16T09:59:00.002-07:00

Spencer received an early Christmas present last week. An awesome Gary Fischer mountain bike with front shocks and 29" wheels. Lets all look at it with envy.

I woke up still in a deep sleep

2009-11-26T08:49:00.003-07:00

Are you leading your life? or letting life lead you?

I want to say I have control of my life, but I am not naive.

I like most Americans stand around like a fawn in headlights waiting for powerful men in suits to pull us out of the way. We starve if commercials dont tell us what to eat. Would we even be attractive to the same people if our world didnt tell us every minute what is attractive?

Today is thanksgiving. Soon it will be Christmas. All this fake holiday cheer and "must have" advertisments always put me in a funk. Dont put me in the Ba-hum-bug catagory just yet. I like many things about the holidays, I just hate the way this country gets around the holidays. Do your kids really need more toys that will go un-played with shoved under their bed where they will be forgotten. Ok.... I am trying not to be bitter..... breathe..... happy thoughts.....ok better.

Family. Isn't that what the holidays are all about? I always wished my family would get together on thanksgiving and Christmas, but my mother had to work and weylin is not a fan of big family celebrations. My family would be great on the holidays: drinking wine and liquors, cracking jokes, discussing politics, eating Italian food. You know how a family should be.

Lately family has meant watching what you say so you don't offend anyone, feeling like an outsider, searching for subjects to relate to, not disclosing any information about my personal life because nobody approves. I don't think that is how a person should feel around family. Granted it cant last like this forever. One day, when the mood is right, I will drop the bomb. I will stand up and say,

"Hey. I am never gonna change. So learn to love me like this. No I am not the same religion as you, but who gives a shit about that. We are family. That means you are stuck we me, as I am stuck with you. I don't feel the need to change you or preach my beliefs to you. All I ask is that you do the same. Don't be offended if I don't think you know all the answers and belong to the one true religion. I don't even believe there is a one true religion. That's right, I admit I don't know the answers. And I LOVE IT. I love not knowing. It allows my mind to be open to everything. So, stop walking on eggshells around me cause I am not going to around you. I choose to live a different lifestyle than you, like most of the world. So unless you plan on living in a cave and never venturing out into society, you need to learn to live with me."

I hope that wasn't too harsh. I love my whole family, but I need to feel some acceptance or I might always hate the holidays.

Sorry for my depressing angry rant... maybe this will cheer you up:

Remember Remember the 10'th of January

2009-11-16T11:34:00.006-07:00

I was reminiscing about my first few months after I moved to Utah. My first real winter, my first battle with the snow.... and the snow won. The following something I wrote January 10th 2008. I cant believe its been almost 2 years since I stared deep into the cold dark eyes of death.
_______________________________________________________________
Last night... I went snow shoeing... I didn't even know what that meant until I was up on a mountain in 4 feet of snow and it was still snowing. My comical adventure begins with a boy, we are friends and went to the same Singles Ward, he saw me yesterday and said" are you coming snowshoeing?" I responded, "heck no... I've seen this movie the black person dies first." he laughed and said "well I will be here at 6:30 and you are going". So at about 6 O'clock my roommate Katie got home. I was in a sweater and jeans... she asked where I was going and I told her... she proceeded to laugh and tell me it was gonna be like 15 degrees and I was gonna Die if I don't layer up.
The conversation went like this.
K- do you have snow pants?
R-no
K-do you have sweat pants?
R-no
K-do you have long johns?
R-no
K-well other than jeans what do you have?
R-I have yoga pants!
K-*laughs* put those over your jeans. Do you have waterproof gloves?
R-no. I have cheap 99 cent gloves I picked up in line at Smith's.
K-*laughs* This is gonna be fun.
She put me in jeans, yoga pants, and pajama pants. I put on a long sleeve shirt, then a t-shirt, then a hoodie, then borrowed a jacket from my roommate Rachel. Well after gaining 5 dress sizes Craig walked in the door. "Are you ready Hollywood?"
Outside there was much commotion as young adults were grouping together. We hopped in the back of an SUV filled with strangers and headed to the mountain. I have never been on a mountain before, nor did I understand the concept that the temp drops real low at night..... real low! "What have I gotten myself into?"
I followed the crowd like a lost puppy, they were getting two of these strange metal things from a truck, maybe I should too. I grabbed a pair of snow shoes and stood there like an idiot staring at the crazy contraptions. "how do these things work?" I said getting my foot caught. Steve remembered me from our ward came up to me and said "Hey Hollywood, I will help" Steve to the rescue (apparently my ward thought Hollywood was a cute nickname). Once the snow shoes were on it was time for the adventure to begin (although getting dressed was an adventure already). People started wondering up the mountain and I didn't want to be in the back (that's where you die) so I jumped in line. After about 10 minutes I asked "is the whole thing up hill" someone ahead laughed and said "Is that Hollywood?" I went on for about 15 more minutes before my frost bitten fingers and lungs got the best of me. I got off the trail and leaned against a tree. "don't worry about me I will wait for the end of the line and jump in." Well the end of the line came and the last person said there was another group about 40 feet away and they would be coming up in a couple of minutes. I was not ready to go on, so I waited, alone, in the forest, without a flashlight, and it was snowing .... 10 minutes went by and I didn't see a single person... "this is how I die" I said aloud to myself "this is is. I can see the headlines, Hollywood girl found frozen to death in Big Cottonwood Canyon." I got back on the trail and begun back up. thinking "Wheres Craig who invited me? He should he be worried." I made it to where the trail of trekked through snow split.... the right went straight up the mountain... and the left went along a scary ridge. I could not tell which way the group went and I was too far to see lights or hear voices. "I am gonna die". I went left... imagining myself falling down and rolling into a snowball like a cartoon. Then up ahead I saw it... a flicker of a flashlight....YAY!!! People!!!! I hurried to the top and found the group. Some one said.... "hey Hollywood you made it. I thought you turned around."
"No, I just got ditched and almost died alone on a fricken mountain"

life or something like it

2009-11-10T10:18:00.003-07:00

What is the purpose of life other than to simply live.

I once felt very motivated and determined to read Anna Karenina, only 1224 pages. And I admit I did not finish the book, I got frustrated with all the Russian phrases and words I had to look up in order to understand what was going on. However.... the first sentence in the book impacted my life. It was almost 2 years ago when I read it and I stilll think about it on occasion.

"All happy families are alike; all unhappy families are unhappy in their own way."

Lets discuss this.

My perfect spot

2009-10-14T11:59:00.006-06:00

Requirements for my perfect home....

(in the U.S. that is, otherwise I would say Spain, Brazil, Italy, almost anywhere else)

Near a body of water - a river, a nice lake, or the ocean.

Absolutely NO suburbs.... I cant stand houses that all look the same and are built less than 20 feet apart.... yuck.

An amazing Fall/Autumn.... I love fall clothes and fall holidays..... I want colorful leaves as long as I can get them. A location that promotes an active lifestyle... with running/biking trails, lots or parks, and more outdoor activities than indoor.

A main street with a great feel, locally owned shops, bakeries, cafes, book stores, brew pubs. Places that you can become true friends with the people behind the counter, and are always greeted with a "Good Morning Rena. Hows the family?" Local art. Music, sculpture, theater.... I want to feel the creativity of the community everywhere I turn.

Great local eateries. Good Food... Better Service!

Amazing Fishing Spots!!! So Spencer can feel like Brad Pitt in 'A River Runs Through It'

A place where education is important. People take pride in there school system and get involved as a community. I would like to have a decent college near by... university or community.

A VERY picturesque environment. Whether its red rock, mountains, the coast, waterfalls, or canyons... I want to be humbled every time I step outside... I want to sit on my front porch and bask in the glory that is mother nature. I want to feel small. I want to have an "oohh aaww" moment every day.

So what do you think? Is this too much to ask for? Did a city come to mind? Where should I live? Where is my perfect spot?

A few Summer Pics

2009-08-28T09:36:00.001-06:00

Spencer and Dan having a headstand competition. Spencer won.

Alex Finally turned 21! He celebrated at the Tavernacle.

Mexico sounds pretty good right now.

2009-08-28T08:31:00.002-06:00

Orrin Liar Orrin Liar Orrin Liar Orrin Liar Orrin Liar Orrin Liar Orrin Liar Orrin Liar Orrin

I could list many reasons why Utah is NOT the best state for me to live in, but the one that might actually drive me out would be the lies the politicians say and the people who believe it.
So Orrin Hatch ... you piece of shit.... I copied and pasted directly from Obama's Website...

REDUCES COSTS — Rising health care costs are crushing governments,
businesses, individuals, and families, and they must be brought under control
for hard-working Americans.
GUARANTEES CHOICE — Every American must have the freedom to choose
their plan and doctor – including the choice of a public insurance option.
ENSURES QUALITY CARE FOR ALL — All Americans must have access to
quality, affordable care.

Mr. Orrin Hatch (what a dumb name) please stop telling people and funding commercials that say Obama is trying to take away choice for all Americans. If you like your current healthcare plan you can F**KING keep it. And I hope you do cause I hate to picture MY government paying your medical bills.

A great Sunday

2009-08-04T12:36:00.002-06:00

Sunday was a fun day.... we went to Happy Sumo with Darci and got yummy yummy sushi. Then we went to the clark planetarium and saw Under The Sea 3D. It was flippin awesome. I have never been so scared of a cod fish in my life.

Then we went to Lowes and picked up a patio cover for Spencers Parents. Went to Kaysville and mingled with the family for a while. And for those of you who dont know... Tanner got his mission call to Tempe Arizona. He leaves this fall.

We cruised on up to Roy and spent the evening chilling in the shade of Todd & Becky's backyard. It was a relaxing evening. Kick back a few cold ones. Take off your shoes. Feel the warm breeze on your skin. Just want I needed.

Join us next time.

Oregon Roots

2009-07-28T09:57:00.016-06:00

I arrived early Friday morning at the Portland airport. The air was crisp, clean, and woke me up more than a cup of overly priced coffee. It was sunny and 65 degrees. Beautiful. By midday it was about 90-95 degrees the whole time. Weylin was waiting for me in his new Jeep Patriot and we headed into the city. We stopped at a local restaurant for breakfast where I enjoyed a Spinach and Havarti cheese omelet and seasoned potatoes. Yum.

Me and Weylin

After breakfast and a quick stop by my moms work we headed to Stayton. Population 6,800. I stayed 2 nights at my grandparents solar powered house on a street lined with large trees. I spent the afternoon making blueberry pie and eating green beans picked from the garden. I took a stroll in the garden and picked raspberries, blueberries, and boysenberries until mt finger tips were dark purple. "This is the life" I thought. My grandpa returned home from a hike to cone peak (5300 above sea level), and he is 83 years young. For dinner we had turkey, gravy, steamed green beans, cranberry stuffing, and sweet potatoes. Yum

Me and Grandpa

Solar House

I woke up the first morning to Italian opera and the spell of oatmeal cookies baking. My Grandma was in the kitchen as usual and my Grandpa was reading the paper sitting on the bar stools. My grandpa lives in a fantasy world where you think of s type of food and it appears magically in front of you. Today he had homemade yogurt, cereal with blueberries, juice, toast with homemade jam. He never reaches for any of it. He just looks up from his paper and it is there. He eats, then when he looks up the dirty dishes are magically gone. I had hot cereal with brown sugar and blueberries.

We spent the afternoon at a local festival in Stayon. I saw some cool cars. One made of Oak and a Porsche that looked like an Autobot. It was a good relaxing day.

The Next day we met my parents in Silverton and had lunch at a Thai restaurant. After lunch my mom took me shopping in downtown Salem. Oh the smell of patchouli and coffee. I missed all the tea houses, homemade soap stores, organic clothing, vegan food, people on corners playing instruments, tattoos, sexy clothing stores, the girl will dread locks to her waist. Oh Salem, you are loved.

Find your own chair bitches!

2009-06-30T10:37:00.002-06:00

Personal Power! As Anthony Robbins would say "is the best thing you can gain in your life." Do I have it? How do I get it? What the hell is it? You might be asking. Well I think it is when you keep control of all the factors in your life. Whether its obstacles, or blessings. Are you controlling them or letting them make the decisions for you? Are you emotions blocking you from seeing opportunity?

in his words, "What’s your definition of an extraordinary life? There are as many answers as there are people. For some it may be to make $5 million. For some it may be to make $5 million and give it away to charity. For others, it may be to be a loving husband or a great mother. Whatever your definition is, you deserve to be fulfilled in whatever direction you take your life. The challenge is that in today’s complex world, it’s so easy to get caught in the process of achieving so much, that it’s sometimes easy to lose focus of what you really want. We believe to attain an extraordinary life—a life on your terms, one filled with unbridled joy, ultimate success and lasting fulfillment—it’s imperative you make progress in the areas of life that are most important to you. Anthony Robbins has uncovered and refined a unique system for anyone who wants to take their life to the next level."

ok I didnt mean to preach Tony Robbins as this all knowing man, but TR aside his philosophy is right.

We are in a recession, we cant afford to visit my family, we cant go on the glacier trip I wanted, jobs are shaky.... and still I am confident that everything will be ok. That we will be happy. Spencer and I will celebrate our 1 year anniversay this summer. That is a joyous thing. I am controll of my emotions and not lettign things add stress to my life. Why? Because i know whats important and I have it. Love, Friendship, Health. Everything else is a bonus. Its helps to have a husband who believes simplicity is better and is not too materialistic. Life is good.

So I will sit here on my big F*#@ING chair. Cause I have the power.

Please no flash photography.

2009-04-26T22:48:00.004-06:00

We lost our camera! and i feel a little empty. I feel like i am going to miss precious moments of our lives. The truth is, it was Spencer's camera, I have never owned a camera. I have had a couple "one time use"cameras. Which brings me to my point. I went 23 years without a fancy digital camera. And now I have gone 2 weeks without it and suddenly my life has changed. Suddenly i need it. It makes me happy. Pathetic. Its sad that a little piece of metal and plastic can become something so important. But lets think of all the other things we cant live without. Microwaves, coffee makers, blenders, computers, DVD players, microwave dinners. Could you give any of that up? Would you? No you wouldn't, cause you need it. And frankly, you forgot how to live without it. We like to go camping and travel, act like we don't need our little comforts for a week. But we only do it knowing we will come back to our safe comfortable lives with our many machines that make living so easy. Really we have it so easy. Pioneers, Pilgrims, Farmers, Miners, and Explorer's, they had to make something out of nothing. We need something it is already made and waiting on a shelf at a store on every corner. Lucky we are. Don't forget. Nothing comes cheap. Life may be easier, but at what true cost. We become a little more weak, a little more ungrateful, and consume more than ever. I guess I really don't have a point. Except love everything you have! Take what you need, and leave the rest!

"Plant a Tree Day"

2009-04-09T13:23:00.004-06:00

http://www.arborday.org/
Arbor Day is April 24th
Lets learn about Arbor Day:
Arbor Day is a holiday in which individuals and groups are encouraged to plant and care for trees. Arbor Day originated in Nebraska City, Nebraska, United States and is celebrated in a number of countries. On the first Arbor Day, an estimated one million trees were planted.

Now lets read a poem about trees:

Breath

by J. Daniel Beaudry

Tree, gather up my thoughts
like the clouds in your branches.
Draw up my soul
like the waters in your root.

In the arteries of your trunk
bring me together.
Through your leaves
breathe out the sky.

Quote

2009-04-07T10:02:00.001-06:00

"take me for what i am
who i was meant to be
and if you give a damn
take me or leave me"
*Rent

I am one with the Rhino

2009-03-27T18:05:00.002-06:00

Animal symbolism of the rhinoceros deals with:

Agility
Solitary
Wisdom
Paradox
Freedom
Stability
Gratitude
Longevity
Judgment
Grounding
Peace of Mind
Self-Assurance
Unconventional
Sensory Perception

Animal symbolism of the rhinoceros revolves around a mass of misguided perception. The rhino is replete with contradictions.

One of the top three largest land mammals, the rhino’s physical presence is mammoth. Although the rhino is known to display aggressive behavior, for the most part it is a passive creature – preferring to roam its wide-open grassy spaces in contemplative solitude. Here we see the first of many paradoxes that lead us to the underlying symbolic theme of the rhinoceros: “things are not as they seem.”

Rhino animal symbolism reminds us to appreciate the expansive bounty we have around us. When the rhino comes to us in our daily lives it is time for us to stop and give thanks to the infinite wonders occurring in every millimeter and minute of our lives. Here are a few examples of how we may do this:

Do as the rhino does and press your feet into the mother (earth) with connective assurance that all is well.
Inhale the richness of green as the rhino does in the tall grasses in which it lives. Savor the scent – impress it fully into memory – recall it during times when you need revitalization.
Surround yourself in cool comfort as the rhino does with his mud bath rituals. Again, let the rich abundance and stability of the mother (earth) enfold you and reassure you.

It is the rhino’s intimate connection with the earth that makes it a perfect symbol for confidence, assurance, steadiness, and sure-footedness. When we are feeling insecure, nervous, or disconnected, the best tonic for our nervy ails is to allow the rhino to run through our spiritual realm. Mentally envision the stoic, noble rhino swaggering easily across the awing expanse of the Ngorongoro Crater where the scenery is equally matched to the regal rhino’s energy.

And speaking of energy, the rhino possesses solar animal symbolism and you will find your envisioning it will produce heat within your body.

Simply put, the rhino is a creature of substance, stamina, solidity, and explosive power. When you are feeling transparent and empty, invite the rhino into your being – see what happens – observe yourself being filled with the majesty this creature represents.

The animal symbolism of the rhino horn deals with:

Protection
Achievement
Heightened Senses
Utilization of Inner Resource

It’s not the actual horn that is powerful – the horn itself is nothing but built-up rhino skin – physically, the horn is worthless. Symbolically however, the horn is priceless.

God Help America

2009-03-26T22:51:00.001-06:00

(Spencer)
I encountered a post on facebook stating that the 10 poorest cities in America (pop. Over 250,000) always nominate democratic mayors- the evidence suggesting that only the poor and insane vote for democrats. At first I was enraged. Then I was curious. I did some research and this is what I found.

10 richest cities in America (pop. over 250,000).

http://dcjobsource.com/richest.html, and http://www.iweblists.com/us/government/Mayors.html (I did it the slow way before I found these sites).

1. San Jose, California- Chuck R. Reed- Democrat
2. Anchorage, Alaska- Matt Claman- Democrat
3. San Francisco, California- Gavin Newsom- Democrat
4. Virginia Beach, Virginia- William D. Sessoms, Jr- Republican
5. San Diego, California- Jerry Sanders- Republican
6. Anaheim, California- Curt Pringle- Republican
7. Raleigh, North Carolina- Charles Meeker- Democrat
8. Seattle, Washington- Greg Nickels- Democrat
9. Washington, DC- Adrian M. Fenty- Democrat
10. Honolulu, Hawaii- Mufi Hunnemann- Democrat

7 out of the 10 cities with the highest income (per capita) employ a democratic mayor. It seems to be more of a big city thing than a poverty thing.

I can’t say I belong to either party. I did vote for Obama. And, yes, it is because of the sense of hope and change he brings to the country.

Money. Money. Money. I guess it is a necessary evil. But I hate it! Especially when it is exchanged for labor in countries so far away that it’s foreign value doesn’t even resemble its domestic value. Americans desperately need to consider- what is a dollar worth in America today. Key words- in America, today. How is it possible that we can earn so many dollars with so little work. It is at historic records. Echoing the constitution, “all men are created equally.” We should all have the same rights and opportunities for whatever just pursuit might interest us individually. Is it really just that we take advantage of human beings in countries that do not have the same opportunities offered to us. Ask yourself again- how is it possible that we can earn so many dollars with so little work. Let me spell it out for you- SLAVERY. We exploit less fortunate people, like the hard workers of China, Indonesia, Honduras, India, Mexico, Guatemala, etc (just a few countries I found on household items). Not to mention the fuel, for which we so casually swipe a piece of plastic and pump, costs much more that just under $2.00/gal. We are in the middle of a war for oil. Is it really worth the lives of our friends and family, not to mention the uncounted dead men, women and children outside our borders. Out of sight, out of mind. America’s wealthy have found a way to appear decent by indirectly enslaving foreign laborers. And we, the average American citizens, are victims of consumerism. We are so damned selfish! I am sick at the thought of calling myself an American. There is no pride left in that title. The difference between American slaves and foreign, working-class slaves is that we have a choice. There is not much the Chinese worker can do about his position in society. If he doesn’t work, he and his family will die. We on the other hand are free enough to resist the temptations of society. True, most of are incredibly addicted to the ease with which we acquire our luxuries. However, if we were all aware of the damage our greed is doing to the rest of the world, we might me more inclined to change.

Let the dollar plummet in value. Let wealthy international businesses topple to the ground. Let humility overcome each American individually. Let the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave be free and brave enough to confront our own . I do not exclude myself from this ignorant and evil lifestyle (they are my house-hold items). I just want to change. Someone help me, and the rest of America, change.

“…and if to live we have to be numb, I’d rather know the pain. I’d rather know. I’d rather know…” Rise Against

The political/social pyramid is imposed upon us all at birth. It doesn’t care what you want and would never wait for a request or application for participation. If you are born in America, you will live and die by American rules. A nation is just another business idea. It’s another way to gain power, fame and money. Power is our substitute for self-control. Fame is our substitute for love. Money is our substitute for hard-work.

I would love to be able to say: I never asked to use your roads. I never asked your policemen or soldiers to protect me. I never asked you to create imaginary lines on the earth to divide country, state and city. I never asked you to keep people from crossing them. I never asked you to require each member of your club to carry a plastic card bearing an identification number in order to keep track of us all. I never asked you to fling bombs and bullets at people in other clubs. I sure the hell didn’t ask you to send machines into space that can follow and record my every move. I didn’t ask you to listen to my phone calls just to be sure I’m not planning to attack you. I wish I could say all these things. But I can’t. I need your roads. I need your policemen and soldiers. I need your dividing borders. I need you to keep certain people out. I need you to know where I am just in case I need anything else. I need you to kill the people who want to hurt me. I need you to monitor everyone, so you can stop people from hurting my innocent family and friends. But I wish I didn’t.

I miss you Gramps

2009-03-22T08:56:00.002-06:00

I had a dream last night that I was at my grandparents house in Stayton Oregon. Its the only house they have lived in in my lifetime and I have every wall memorized. I was picking fresh green beans and sneaking a few to eat. I love fresh green beans and how they snap in your mouth. My grandma is always in the kitchen. She will ask if you are hungry and pull a tin of Biscotti from the cupboard. If you decline, she will over you pizza that she made earlier (just in case). This crust square pizza with olives, mushrooms, and sausage. Its easy to fill up on apetizers at their house. My grandpa has pictures of mountains from around the world on the walls. Peaks he has climed and conquored. My grandpa calls himself "the kitchen supervisor", as he has no clur how to cook but takes credit for all the meals. He is a jokester. I once braught my friend Brandy over for dinner, he kept calling her scotch. When he was in the Military he smoked Kent cigerettes, and decided it was a good name. Hence my uncle in Napa California, Christopher Kent McAuliffe. His name is Ronald, my mom is Rhonda, and my dad is Richie, so naturally he insisted I had a R name when I ws born. So I got 2, Rena Rene. And I am sure he was happy when I added a 3rd, Rena Rene Rappleye.

I miss my grandparents and I hope to see them soon. They have been great influences in my life, and I am grateful for it. I love you both.

The Perfect Marriage

2009-03-07T09:41:00.002-07:00

The Real Central Intelligence Agency

2009-03-03T14:41:00.003-07:00

Warning! Rant:

If you are going to call yourself "The Central Intelligence Agency". And assume you are more intelligent than most folks you better take a hard look at yourself. Who are you really fooling? Poor uneducated people living in the Stix. We are on to you. It seems George Orwell was right. Big brother is watching. And he doesnt care if you are hungry, clothed, or shooting up in an alley. As long as you dont question him. He will tell you what you need to fear and who the enemy is. He will let you know what you need to buy and what Holidays you should celebrate. Because you are an American and that is the American way. So if you ever feel lonely, buck up lil camper, cause you can always look and find a satelite or camera or man in a trenchcoat and glasses just around tha corner.

The Plan

2009-02-25T15:04:00.000-07:00

The Plan is to buy a used Winnebago that sleeps 6. Drive down the pacific coast hitting all the cities we researched along the way. Entering Mexico at Nogales. We expect this trip to take 1 1/2 to 2 weeks. While on the trip we will take time in each location to see the markets, hospitals, beaches, etc. Then we will choose where we liked best, go back and look for an apartment. Right now with the USD to MX ratio 1:14.66, we can live in mexico for about 5,000 USD a year (rent and utilities only).

So we save $10,000 and hit the road. Goodbye America! Hola Mexico!

Depending on the location rent can range from 1000 to 3000 pesos. We found some great 2 bedroom apartments with a view of the beach for 1500 pesos a month, thats about $102 usd!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Dream

2009-02-25T14:54:00.000-07:00

I want to introduce myself. My name is Rena I live in Salt Lake City Utah with my husband Spencer. We are fed up with the way this country is run, and in desperate need for an adventure. We first started talking about moving out of the country last March. Spencer is fluent in Spanish after living in Paraguay for 2 years and was interested in teaching English. First we thought... Spain. Of course, Tapas food, Running with the bulls, Europe... what can be bad about that. Well the dollar to Euro ratio is so bad right now we would lose money if we move anywhere in Europe. So we said "What about Mexico?". The average American pictures firecrackers and guns shooting up in the air, people dressed like cowboys spitting chew on the dirt, no paved roads, no schools. Well other than the firecrackers we have proven everything wrong after months of research.
Actually along the Pacific (where we are looking to move) the towns are quite modern. Clean streets, nice hospitals, bilingual schools, and oh beautiful beaches. Beaches that make your jaw drop and your eyes blink because it looks like a dream.
And this dream.... was going to come true.